What One Insight May Help Your Marriage The Most?

By Mike Edwards

If I were to ask you if life is hard or easy, most of you would probably say hard at times. Few would deny that challenges arise from time to time. This same insight could help your marriage get off to a good start or perhaps help you dig you way out of a mess. Now sometimes, your partner is a mess and refuses to step up to the challenge! Just make sure you aren’t the mess. All to say, marriage is hard sometimes and hard work is required to get back on track.

My personal naiveness 

Young couples – I doubt most of you were as naïve as I was in the beginning of my marriage. I assume agreement on our differences would quickly evaporate because of our love for one another. Heck, I probably assumed we wouldn’t have any differences. I suppose because dating went so well was part of my challenge. But I ended up pursuing counseling as a career because of the marriage struggles I noticed my parents had. Yet, I guess I assumed I was totally different. I went for some premarital counseling, but I have always been hard of hearing. The truth is beginning to share things including closets, children, and in-laws, and that each individual brings their own baggage into the relationship, creates challenges. 

What is a critical attitude when marriage gets hard 

Many of us start off saying our partner is our best friend, but we don’t always act like that. Happily married couples behave like good friends, abiding by the golden rule. If both partners act consistently like they wish to be treated, characterized by respect, affection, and empathy, marriages are good. Regardless, there are challenges in 7 days-a-week relationships unlike in other friendships where you don’t share as much. When the relationship is struggling, often it will be because one is not living out the golden rule. Start by changing yourself rather than trying to change your partner. Are you treating your partner as you wish to be treated? 

What is a critical skill when marriage gets hard 

Watch expectations. Great relationships have differences. It is how you handle them that is critical. One who begins a relationship knowing that he/she does not have a right to expect everything he/she desires sets himself/herself up for success. Living happily incompatibly is the goal. Discuss and solve differences in a calm manner, as best friends do, so solutions can be discovered. It is better to try again later than let anger fly. Respond not react to differences. Do you have anger rules and agree to stop the discussion and try again later when these boundaries are violated? 

What does God have to do with it?

I have to put a plug in for a Creator encouraging going the extra mile in marriage. A great advantage of my being a God-follower is knowing good enough isn’t enough. Marriages can fail despite an 85% success rate. Great marriages aren’t about being good enough or not as bad as other partners. The best goal of marriage or any relationship is aiming for perfection. My view of God, as an encourager and forgiver, inspires me to pursue perfection in my relationships without being paralyzed by guilt when failing. I have the “want to” to be perfect – okay getting closer to perfect. That credit goes to God!

What One Insight May Help Your Marriage The Most?

Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. He couldn’t find enough people to discuss God openly so he started blogging years ago. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like  He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com

How Do You Not Turn A Child Away From God?

By Mike Edwards

It can be disheartening when our child does not share the same beliefs or passion about God as they get older. I have good news if reading this and kids are young or grown. My kids are in their thirties. I have things I could have done better. I did apologize what I thought I could do differently. If a parent has any kind of relationship, kids will get over mistakes. If kids are younger, you can plan ahead. Decide if my plan below makes sense or develop your own.

Parents. communicate the real reason for a relationship with God 

Many of us who grew up in church were taught the reason Jesus came to this earth was to save us from Hell so we could go to Heaven. Your kid isn’t going to Hell regardless of their beliefs. A literal Hell isn’t biblical. See here.  Jesus spoke of loving God not to get into heaven but to receive help in loving others here on earth. See here.  Personally, the biggest reason for being a God-follower is the forgiveness, inspiration, and encouragement I sense in striving to be a better human being. Influences in our life don’t have to be audible. My parents aren’t alive but I am still influenced. Pursuit of a godly life is never in vain!  The best a parent can do as children age is less talking if not interested and walking the talk. If God exist, God can handle matters.

Parents, it’s their journey not yours 

Many parents assume if their kid question, doubt, or even wants nothing to do with God that they are going to Hell. Not true! When children are young and a parent believes in God and walks the talk for the most part, kids are likely to go along for the ride. But as our children get older, their relationship with God is their own personal journey. They aren’t into God like you. Relax! Stop worrying! Your belief in a personal God suggests God will engage with them in their own journey. 

The Bible doesn’t always determine what God is really like 

The biggest mistake I made as a parent was believing my interpretation of the Bible was always right. My son came to me after his teachers suggested evolution was the creative process God used for the creation of humans. I was emphatic that evolution wasn’t true because of my biblical interpretation of the Bible. Turns out I could be wrong – https://biologos.org/  I could have advised what I believe, but he had to decide what he is going to believe. Besides, it can’t be proven all written down in our Bibles about God was inspired by God, that the writers always understood God perfectly.

What image of God you portray to your children is so important!

The Bible is subject to interpretation and scholars don’t agree on many moral issues addressed in the Bible. We can also determine what God is like according to one’s own moral intuitions. Your child’s view of what a moral God is like is valid. Our mental views of God shape our attitudes toward God. My view of God inspires me to pursue perfection in my relationships without being paralyzed by guilt when failing. I have the “want to” to be perfect. I believe that motivation comes from God! Surely a loving God only seeks to love you like you wish you were always able to love others. We all know how we wish our parents had loved us. This is the God you can believe. Don’t convey God is hard to please and pissed off about sin rather than what sin is doing to us. 

Have a Plan!

Don’t assume that your child’s unbelief or lack of a relationship with God is one being rebellious. There are personal or intellectual reasonable objections to not believe. I was raised in a home that preached belief in God and attended church more than once a week. I didn’t have a great relationship with my parents who pushed that belief. I can’t tell you why I never turn away from God. It isn’t because I am so outstanding morally. Others turn away from God in my situation. A relationship with God is your child’s personal journey. Parents can share their personal beliefs and even encourage when younger, but eventually we must leave a child in the hands of God. Strive to have a open, loving relationship with your children.

How Do You Not Turn A Child Away From God?

Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. He couldn’t find enough people to discuss God openly so he started blogging years ago. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like  He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com

What Are Harmful Lies About God?

By Mike Edwards

I know “lies” is a strong word. There are many types of untruths. One is caught stealing via video but denies guilt. Then, there are less offenses. Christians leaders often make claims about God “according to God’s word.” They know fully well others who accept the authority of the Bible have a different interpretation of the same passages, yet they don’t openly share this. The Bible can be the main culprit for turning many away from God. A Book can’t really be held responsible for one’s actions, but certain views of the Bible proclaimed can be the problem. I don’t claim to always be right but I am admitting that. Decide for yourself what is likely true of a loving God.

A literal Hell is a lie! 

I am convinced that God creating a literal Hell is a biblical myth.  See here.

Women can’t be priests or preachers and should be more submissive than men is a lie

I doubt God would put men in leadership position over women, in marriage which has encouraged dominance on the man’s part leading to atrocities women face at the hands of men. Like many views about God, the Bible can also be interpreted to endorse roles according to gifts not gender. Shouldn’t the most qualified or gifted, whether male or female, be appointed CEO, preacher, or priest? That God thinks women can’t serve in the same roles as men is a myth. See here.

God condemns gays is a lie

A loving God couldn’t possibly condemn gays when they can no more choose who they are attracted to than straights can? If you are a straight man, don’t you naturally have to fight not looking at naked women than men? Ask gays their battle! Who chooses to be gay when one has to hide their sexuality because of bigotry and hostility? We claim God condemns gays according to the Bible. Another myth. See here.

God inspired, thus approved, all written in the Bible is a lie

See here.

Salvation in the Bible is about avoiding Hell and getting into Heaven is a lie

The main message of the Bible/Jesus isn’t about going to Heaven or Hell but how to live life here on earth. That is true salvation. See here.

God is all powerful and controlling, thus allows evil, is a lie

If God allows evil, that mean God can stop evil and doesn’t. God can’t be loving and controlling. See here.  See here.

Jesus dying on the Cross so God didn’t have to kill you is a lie

God is not a blood-thirsty Jesus killer. Demanding the blood of an innocent party doesn’t legally resolve another person’s guilt. My going to jail for a friend’s wrongdoing doesn’t somehow clear my friend of their crime. God didn’t violate Judas’ freedom by requiring he betray Jesus. Jesus accepting death than powering over others may be the reason billions have been influenced to live unselfishly. God isn’t pissed at you for sinning. God just wants you to change for your good and those you have relationships with. See here.

You are doomed in the afterlife if not a Christian is a lie 

A loving God wouldn’t only let Christians into heaven when the majority of people born into this world died without knowledge of the Bible or Jesus. One’s religion, or rebellion against a certain religion, is often based on the family born into whether it is Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, etc. Is God a God of chance? I am convinced all will meet their Creator in the afterlife and decide whether they want to live with God forever or not. See here.  See here.

You can’t be a God-follower if you don’t attend an institutional church is a lie 

In the Bible “Church” was not a building or a place attended once a week. Jesus referred to His followers as being the Church.  Jesus did not specify where followers must gather or what they must do. Find environments to be encouraged and inspire others to love as radically as Jesus did. Paul warned against the harm of divisions, also known as Denominations, among followers. (I Cor. 1:12) Let’s seek more. Some of us grew weary of religion but not God. See here.

God is pissed and views you as scum is a lie

God is not an angry egomaniac. God doesn’t want to be feared as if that leads to inspiring relationships. If God was so worried about their ego, God would not have given us freedom to contradict their wishes. God’s unforced desire for glory is no different than a loving parent’s desire for respect. They only want what we deep down desire – loving others like we want to be loved. I only know what a loving God may be like according to how a parent should love their child. My kids weren’t always saints but I hated their behavior, not them. See here.

God isn’t moral – humanly speaking – is a lie. 

Even atheists believe One claiming to be God must be perfect. We must question biblical writers’ understanding of God if interpretations are contrary to people’s ideas of a perfect, loving God. When the Bible challenges us to be perfect like God (Mt. 5:48), the assumption is we can know what perfection is. Godly and human perfect love must be one and the same. See here.  See here.

God is a prayer genie is a lie

Praying doesn’t make God more caring. God is already doing all they can in a free world. Pretending God can simply heal without accounting for freedom can makes one’s suffering worse. Did I not pray or beg enough? Prayer isn’t about manipulating for gain but pursuing a relationship with our Creator for self-examination, sharing concerns, and not feeling alone in a chaotic world. God is not a Genie in a bottle who can singlehandedly all by themselves make things instantly happen without our help to change the world for good. See here.  See here.

God being an end-of-the-world doomsayer is a lie

God isn’t going to destroy the world in the supposed battle of Armageddon. One might ask if the Bible teaches God is going to destroy the world in the future, why did Jesus tell his audience that supposed predictions about the world ending would happen in their lifetime (Mt. 24:34). Jesus seemed to not be speaking of a sky-opening, physical rapture, or Jesus wouldn’t have warned of the signs to not miss His coming (Mt. 24:3-4). In the first century the temple and Jerusalem were destroyed and millions of lives were lost. Biblical Judaism ceased to exist. This could have been the end of the age that Jesus warned of. See here.

An ancient Book subject to interpretation cannot be the definitive voice of what God is really like. I can use my moral intuitions and common sense to imagine what a loving God is like. I am not clueless. A perfect human and spiritual parent surely have much in common.

What Are Some Major Lies About God?

Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. He couldn’t find enough people to discuss God openly so he started blogging years ago. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like  He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com

Differences Among Christians

by Jim Gordon

When we think about our fellow Christians, we should think about the love, acceptance and fellowship we can have with other believers. Unfortunately, with all the different religious doctrines, denominations, interpretations and various versions of the Bible, it seems there are always times when we run into conflict and are not so loving to one another.

Each of us as brothers or sisters in Christ seem to want it our way. Our church, our interpretation, our version of the Bible. We each feel that we are right and feel the need to distance ourselves from those who feel differently.

Have you noticed how religion wants to set the rules so each of us know what it takes to be a good Christian, all according to a particular doctrine or church organization? Do this, don’t do that, stay away from this and make sure you participate in that. We think we have to be in every service and be active with this group or that group. If you are not reading a particular version of the Bible, you are just wasting your time, or if you are not part of a church you are backslidden, at least that is the way some fellow Christians make you feel. Rules, rules, rules.

Maybe it is time to stop arguing over versions, interpretations, church attendance and such and start focusing on Jesus, who is to be our first love. If we can focus on what Jesus told us to do, love God and love others, we should be able to love and accept others even in our differences.

Focusing on Jesus and following the guidance of the Spirit can often lead us into ways we did not expect to go. Many of us begin to ask questions, have doubts and deconstruct our faith. This does not mean we lose our faith or walk away from God. No, we actually draw closer to God because we depend on the leading of the Spirit that lives within us.

The thing is, when we find common ground in our faith in Jesus, when we love God with all our heart, soul, strength and mind, we become able to look past the minor differences, the different religious doctrines, denominations, interpretations and various versions of the Bible. We look at each other as fellow believers following the Spirit on many different paths, yet continually moving forward in a close fellowship with God. Keep in mind we are all children of God trying our best to follow the Spirit and be pleasing to our God. It is time to stop fighting against each other and begin to love one another as Jesus loves us. Do not let the minor differences come between the love we can have for one another and the things we can learn through fellowship with our brothers and sisters in Christ.

Jim Gordon and his wife left the institutional church after spending over fifty years within the system. Jim wanted a way to express his thoughts and concerns about the religious system and why he and his wife decided to leave the institution but not their faith in God. Jim can be contacted by email at: jimgordon731@gmail.com

How Do You Know Who Is Telling The Truth?

By Mike Edwards

I admit that I can’t read hearts and minds to know if one is telling the truth or lying for power, financial gain, avoiding liability, or trying to save their job.  I will try to not make this political but religion and politics have much in common. Politicians often discourage civil discussions concerning disagreements and may resort to calling one a conspiracist, just like religious leaders calling those they disagree with a heretic. Open dialogue leads us to getting closer to the truth in religion, political issues, or science. Those who suppress debate – what are they worried about?

Trust those who openly acknowledge when they were wrong 

Religion and politics are somewhat different – biblical interpretation cannot be proven due to future observation but science allows objective future observations. Scholars of biblical interpretation disagree if God condemns gay relationships. Future observations will not prove one right or wrong. But in science we did learn conspiracists turned out to be proven right that Covid shots didn’t stop infection and transmission of the virus. It seems to me that science has a way of correcting opinions that biblical interpretation of ancient literature doesn’t. Trust religious leaders who admit they could be wrong, or politicians who acknowledge when proven to be wrong. Many remain silent and hope you don’t notice.

Trust those who admit immoral actions 

Would you forgive a spouse, leader, or politician if they committed adultery? That is up to you. But watch their actions when clearly caught betraying! Do they admit failure and agree to be held accountable 24/7, or do they blame their partner/stress/etc. for their actions? I am not excusing moral failures but many fail. Betrayal is a choice. I trust more those who accept responsibility and blame themselves as opposed to others.

Trust those that invite investigation or debate 

Dr. Fauci claimed rejecting him is rejecting science. But science is an ongoing discussion. Some drugs approved initially are taken off the market. Religious leaders who claim their views are God’s Word and don’t invite debate – are they afraid to defend their views in public so individuals can decide for themselves and possibly disagree. Theologians who hide behind “God said,” are claiming to be holier than those that disagree with them. Politicians who don’t invite debate – don’t trust them further than you can throw them.

Trust those who have more to loss 

Admire theologians who disagree with their congregation or superiors because they differ in their views of God. They are taking a risk in losing their job! There is not much risk agreeing with the common narrative. Watch for politicians who oppose the popular narrative. They may be more principled. Doctors who risk being de-licensed because of their medical views as opposed to Doctors who stand to benefit from the common narrative. Notice those who stand to gain financially or because of job security.   

Trust more those that admit uncertainty 

Those who claim certainty often are naïve and may have other internal motives. Certainty is an illusion unless talking about universal moral sins such as rape or incest. Most decisions are not black and white and require open debate. Assume uncertainty if you have one rational friend who believes differently from you whether it’s about religion or politics. Couples who claim certainty are headed toward divorce or a sucky relationship. God-followers and religious leaders seem hell-bent in telling people what they must believe about God according to their understanding and interpretation of the Bible. Politicians who refuse debate of their policies are no different. Religious or political leaders play God (Superior) in the lives of others by claiming to know the truth and we can’t decide for ourselves. 

Kids are lying when they don’t want to talk about what they did or believe

Trust your instincts whether one is telling you the truth. Trust those who admit wrong or invite investigation of their beliefs. Few such leaders seem to exist!

How Do You Know Who Is Telling The Truth?

Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. He couldn’t find enough people to discuss God openly so he started blogging years ago. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like  He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com

Why Doesn’t God Answer My Prayers?

by Mike Edwards

Quite obviously many of our prayers are not answered. We have every right to ask why God cured my friend’s cancer and not my own or one’s parent cancer and not my parent? Is God really that arbitrary in delving out mercy? What human or goldy parent if able to intervene in suffering does so for one child and the not the suffering of their other child. Where do we go to find answers?

Is the Bible our only source for answers about prayer?

Most God-folks quote the Bible when responding to questions about prayer. They often don’t admit their interpretation of a passage when addressing prayer may be wrong. It is not uncommon for biblical scholars, much less laypeople, to interpret the same passage’s meaning differently. Some interpret the Bible to condemn gays, other do not. Even if we all had the same interpretations, few admit that the biblical writers may not have always understood God perfectly. Okay, me neither! The Bible isn’t our only way to know God. I will suggest that God can’t always stop suffering. Why would a good God stand-by but not a flawed human parent watching their child suffer?

Two assumptions when trying to understand God and prayer

Many Bible-folks assume God is all-powerful, which demands an answer to why God displays Their power or not. Why God acts arbitrarily isn’t easy to answer if God is truly loving, unless you always blame unanswered prayer due to one’s sins. Often, it is proclaimed God’s ways are higher than ours and God is working it all for good. Tell that to a woman raped! It may also be suggested that we sinners have no right to question a Holy God, or that any good is more than we deserve since God’s standard is perfection and we all fall short as sinners. Some relationship!

A second less popular assumption is that God can’t be all-powerful. It is only intuitive that an all-powerful God can control suffering if able to create, be in all places at one time, resurrect Jesus from the dead, etc. But, logically how can God be all-powerful and humans have some freedom/power? Suffering (prayer unanswered) may be because God cannot intervene single-handedly. God can’t physically interfere in evil or suffering without human help. See here.

But miracles?

Lots of prayers asking for healing aren’t answered. Is God’s love infrequent or arbitrary? Do miracles not happen because some people are less sinful or beg better at the feet of an arbitrary God? I believe a better explanation for healings is that various biological and environmental factors are involved such as cells and organs.  If God doesn’t deny human freedom, it may not be a stretch to say God has to account for natural freedom as well. Perhaps miracles can happen when God’s love aligns with countless factors known and not known. God cannot intervene singlehandedly, but a loving God always wants to intervene whenever circumstances will allow.

Why then bother with prayer?

The Bible can’t be the definitive word on God since subject to interpretation and conjecture if God agrees with all written about God. Most Bible-quoting folks believe we are made in the image of God. God surely acts as image bearers think they should act when someone is suffering. I am convinced God is always seeking to intervene when possible.  We don’t have to assume God can answer our prayers but doesn’t for some unknown reason. God suffers with us, but the unfortunate truth in a free world is suffering happens, though God is dying to help. We can pray but be more understanding when God can’t answer our prayers. Lean on God and others for emotional support and encouragement in difficult times.

Why Doesn’t God Answer My Prayers?

Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. He couldn’t find enough people to discuss God openly so he started blogging years ago. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like  He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com

Why Do We Forget the Holy Spirit?

by Jim Gordon

Over the years I spent within the church system, I was told the Spirit of God has been given to us. Yet, the real emphasis on the fact that the Spirit of God actually lives within us seems to be missed. If we could get this deep down within us, that we now live in the Kingdom of God and the Holy Spirit of God actually lives within us, it would certainly help us in sharing the love and power of God with people we meet each day. We do not need to sit back and wait for some future day when we die to enter the Kingdom of God. We can live as one with the Spirit of God in the Kingdom of God each and every day beginning right now.

The more I talk with people who are active in the institutional church, the more I hear that so many (not all) churches emphasize the organization, the building and the pastor, yet neglect the fact that the Holy Spirit of God lives within us.

God does not live in buildings made by hands. God lives in us. The Kingdom of God is within us. We are the temple of the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit is our guide and teacher and we do not have need of anyone to teach us. Yet the church pushes dependence on the organization. It pushes the idea of the pastor being the mouthpiece and intermediary for God. This is just not true. The building is not the house of God, we are, and God communicates directly with us through the Spirit within.

Many people are afraid to trust their inner feelings. We wonder how do we hear from the Spirit within us? The sad thing is we are more in tune with hearing from the pastor each week. We are so used to depending on another human being that we do not try to learn how to trust the leading of the Spirit. The churches have failed at focusing on teaching how to hear from the Spirit, mainly because they want us to continue to depend on the pastor. We have to realize the pastor is not the middle-man or mouth-piece of God. The pastor is a fellow brother or sister in Christ who is just like the rest of us, ever learning and always to be helping and encouraging each another.

For me, I have come to really pay attention when I get an unusual feeling of peace, or a feeling of just knowing something and being at peace that it is right or wrong. I even had dreams a few times where I heard a voice in regard to some specific issue and when I woke up, I acted on it and found the answer I needed. I do not say every dream is from God or every instinct we have is the Holy Spirit, but these are ways the Spirit can lead us. We seem to think we need to clearly hear an audible voice to know it is the Spirit, but I think we need to learn to focus on the inner intuitions and sense of peace.

We must remember this great gift of the Spirit of God living within us. We need to focus on learning how to hear and understand the leading of the Spirit rather than focusing on the words and teachings of men/women.

Here are a few verses from the bible that mention being one with the Spirit and living in the Kingdom of God:

Luke 17:21

nor will they say, ‘See here!’ or ‘See there!’ For indeed, the kingdom of God is within you.

John 14:16,17

I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may be with you forever. Even the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees him nor knows him. You know him, for he dwells with you and will be in you.

John 17:20-23

I do not ask for these only, but also for those who will believe in me through their word, that they may all be one, just as you, Father, are in me, and I in you, that they also may be in us, so that the world may believe that you have sent me. The glory that you have given me I have given to them, that they may be one even as we are one, I in them and you in me, that they may become perfectly one, so that the world may know that you sent me and loved them even as you loved me.

1 Corinthians 3:16

Do you not know that you are a temple of God and that the Spirit of God dwells in you?

1 Corinthians 6:19

Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own?

2 Corinthians 6:16

Or what agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; just as God said, I will dwell in them and walk among them; And I will be their God, and they shall be My people.

2 Timothy 1:14

Guard, through the Holy Spirit who dwells in us, the treasure which has been entrusted to you.

1 John 2:27

As for you, the anointing which you received from Him abides in you, and you have no need for anyone to teach you; but as His anointing teaches you about all things, and is true and is not a lie, and just as it has taught you, you abide in Him.

Jim Gordon and his wife left the institutional church after spending over fifty years within the system. Jim wanted a way to express his thoughts and concerns about the religious system and why he and his wife decided to leave the institution but not their faith in God. Jim can be contacted by email at: jimgordon731@gmail.com

What I Am Hanging Onto

by Glenn Hager

It is so easy to enumerate what I am done with when it comes to religion. It is profoundly more difficult to figure out what to hang onto. I feel like I should occasionally ask myself this question to see if I am total heretic or just a free spirit.

Less and less, is an accurate description of what I am hanging onto, but I am hanging onto those things tighter and tighter.

I could make a massive list of stuff I let go of and another massive list of stuff I don’t know. But this list will be short.

I am hanging onto Jesus.

He is my model for how to live and it’s a model I very often fail to live up to.

He loved outcasts, the diseased, the foreigner, the poor, and the hated.

He rebuked the corrupt and powerful, especially, the religious power brokers.

He was humble, but shockingly truthful.

He told stories that people related to. He was not a theologian and did not preach an expository sermon.

He occasionally confounded and challenged people to go deeper in their understanding.

He was a healer. Though I do not possess divine ability, I can still be a healer of hearts.

He gave people hope for now and for eternity.

I am hanging onto love.

It’s hard to do when people are unlovely.

It’s hard to remember when we get consumed with ourselves and forget about others.

It’s hard to figure out what loves means for an individual.

It’s hard to be nice, or even decent, at time, let alone loving.

But love really works to touch people deeply, like nothing else.

It’s our primary responsibility here on earth.

I am hanging onto truth.

I do believe in objective truth, but what I am referring to is belief and behavior that is so true, it works its way out in regular life. It is real, raw, and not academic, esoteric, or theoretical. It doesn’t require its own subculture. It works in life with all its celebrations and challenges, achievements and disappointments, and triumphs and tragedies. It’s integrated not separated.

I am hanging onto hope.

I believe we can live in peace in this life. I believe we can become more loving. I believe we can live gracefully, gratefully, and joyfully. I believe we can reset to living life this way, even when we get thrown a few curve balls.

I believe there is hope for this life and the next and the next, though we have only a scant few clues and promises about that.

I don’t have any ideas about how to “fix church” or make it more relevant. I often wish I did because after all those years of church, that slot is still not completely filled.

It seems like it gets messed up when we begin to organize it and institutionalize it.

This is a pretty strange statement of beliefs, but it is mine.

Glenn Hager is a former pastor, newspaper columnist, magazine contributor, blogger (glennhager.com), and author of two books. He also designs lighting (http://doo-dads.com/). Glenn and his wife, Patty live in northeastern Illinois. 

What Is Main Message about Bible/Jesus That Christians Get Wrong?

By Mike Edwards

Hell is certainly a message Christians get wrong. I am convinced a literal Hell is a biblical myth.  See here.  We get wrong that God thinks women can’t serve in the same religious or marriage roles that men can. Another myth. See here. Also, we get wrong that God condemns gays according to the Bible. Another myth. See here. But the biggest myth may be that God’s main message according to the Bible is that salvation is about going to Heaven or Hell rather than how to live life here on earth. People reject God based on claims about hell, women, or gays. But it is so important to know that God cares about you here and now and not about just the afterlife.

The main message isn’t about a literal Hell somewhere other than on earth

Gehenna, the Greek word translated as Hell in the New Testament, was the name of a real valley near Jerusalem with a history of terrible, ending slaughter.  Gehenna is best translated Gehenna just as Mount Everest is best translated Mount Everest. There is no word in Hebrew or Greek for “hell.” Jesus used Gehenna to illustrate that spiritual death is as tragic as physical death. God creating a literal Hell where people are tortured for billions of years for beliefs held a short time here on earth isn’t possible biblically or morally.   See here.  See here. 

The main message isn’t about God saving us to enter Heaven away from Earth 

Jesus taught as if God’s Kingdom was near, not coming in distant future. “Truly I tell you, some who are standing here will not taste death before they see that the kingdom of God has come with power.” (Mk 9:1) The Good News throughout the Gospels refers to a Kingdom here on earth now. The kingdom of God “has come upon you” (Mt 12:28) and “is in your midst.” (Lk 17:21) The word “heaven” appears the most in the Gospel of Matthew. The Kingdom of Heaven isn’t a place to go after life on earth. Jesus sought to bring heavenly love to earth – “on earth as in heaven.”

What about eternal life?

Jesus was asked by a religious leader how to have eternal life. (Lk.10:25-37). Jesus elsewhere defined eternal life as beginning in the here and now (Jn 17:3), not what awaited in the afterlife. I doubt the leader had in mind how to get into Heaven away from this Earth. Jesus simply said to love God and your neighbor. “Eternal” appears to be on the quality not quantity in life. Jesus spoke of a life worth living being a loving life empowered by God. Jesus’ salvation was about living a meaningful life here on earth with God’s help. The Bible/Jesus/God’s message isn’t dropping to your knees to avoid Hell to go to Heaven after death, but start loving now – a path toward great relationships.

What did the earliest Gospel says how Jesus spoke to others? 

I read through the Gospel of Mark to see what Jesus’ main message was to others. Mark’s Gospel is considered the earliest written from which Matthew and Luke cited. In all the Gospels Jesus never advises to preach to the masses to save them from Hell in the afterlife. Jesus sought to help others avoid hell here on earth. Sin is destructive. It has natural consequences.

• When Jesus met his disciples, he only said “follow me.” (Mark 1: 16:17, 2:14) A set of beliefs wasn’t required. The main message to the disciples was living a life worth living.
• People were bringing children to Jesus and he said “anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.” (Mark 10:15) The kingdom of God was not a future home but a current reality. Jesus has just said “some who are standing here will not taste death before they see that the kingdom of God has come with power.” (Mark 9:1)
• A rich person asked how to have eternal life. Jesus said sell everything and follow me. (Mark 10: 17-31) Surely Jesus’ point was to love people more than possessions. What does following Jesus mean? When asked what was the greatest commandments, Jesus only said to love God and your neighbors (Mark 12:30-31). What! Not drop to your knees and say a prayer!
• The above interactions are like when Jesus dealt with the women caught in adultery. (Jn. 7:53-8:11) Jesus only encouraged the woman to go and sin no more. Where was his evangelical spiel. He might never see her again! Apparently, Jesus came to encourage living a loving life toward others and yourself.

Didn’t Paul though preach repent to avoid punishment? 

The Apostle Paul did say “believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” (Rm 10:9) Paul recognized Jesus’ death and resurrection, but Jesus’ sacrifice was to draw attention to the Good News already proclaimed by Paul – God’s desire to empower unselfish living. Paul preached about the Kingdom of God being here (Acts). Paul did say “the wages of sin is death.” (Rm. 6:23) But Paul is speaking of spiritual death because Paul is still alive though sin has put him to death (Rm. 7:11). Paul mentions Heaven twice in Romans, yet says nothing about Jesus dying so we can go to Heaven (Rm. 1:18, 10:6). The Apostle Paul who wrote most of the NT never refers to Hell. No prophet in the OT warned of Hell as a consequence for behaviors here on earth.

What about life after death?

We don’t know exactly what happens after life here on earth. We are free to speculate what a loving God might do. Go ahead and live like Hell while here on earth! Careful the regrets you, your family, and friends will feel at the end of your life. Careful that our character developed here on earth may make the change process longer and more painful in the life to come. It is reasonable to believe a loving God can choose to take forever in this life and the life to come to save everyone from themselves. It is possible to interpret the Bible as claiming all eventually go to be with God after death.  See here.

God only seeks to inspire you to avoid a life full of regrets

We are told the message of the Bible is Jesus coming to give you salvation to save you from Hell so you could enter Heaven. I believe Jesus spoke of loving God not to get into heaven but to receive help in loving others as you love yourself now. You may be different than me, but I get help from God in pursuing a life not full of regrets. Try it! It’s on God to come through for you if you choose to follow. Jesus when leaving this earth spoke of having God’s spirit within us.  If you refuse to love, you may end up a lonely, regretful soul.

What Is Main Message About Bible/Jesus That Christians Get Wrong?

Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. He couldn’t find enough people to discuss God openly so he started blogging years ago. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like  He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com