Living for God Outside the Walls of Religion. Done with Religion means we no longer follow the traditions and doctrines of religion, but live for God on a daily basis by the leading of the Holy Spirit.
Wednesday, June 25, 2025
We Are Not All Going to Agree So Let’s Work on Loving One Another
Friday, June 13, 2025
What Is God’s Love Really Like?
Friday, May 30, 2025
Yes I Am A Christian….But (My Idea of Being A Christian is Different than You May Think)
by Michael Donahoe
When I say I am a Christian, people usually stereotype me as a Christian that is something different from what I mean.
People tend to equate Christianity with certain beliefs, doctrines and actions. People who are Christian usually believe certain things, participate in certain things or avoid certain things.
Yet, for me, I do not fit into the normal mold of what people think of as Christianity. A few of those things are as follows:
I do not attend church
I do not believe the Bible is the inerrant word of God
I do not believe the world was created in 6 actual days
I do not believe the USA is a Christian nation nor God’s chosen nation
I am not Republican (nor a Democrat)
I do not claim to be evangelical. I really do not even like using the term Christian because of the negative thoughts it creates
I love and accept people, all people, male, female, black, white, Christian, Muslim, Hindu, Jewish, Atheist, LGBTQ. I believe Jesus said to love God and love one another. I believe we all are created in the image of God.
I am patriotic, but not nationalistic. America is not a Christian nation nor is it God’s chosen nation. It is not OK to force religious beliefs on everyone. We are free to choose for ourselves what we believe and who we follow.
I do believe in science
I do believe the Spirit of God lives within us and we are guided by the Spirit not a book
I do believe in the freedom of choice for all people in all matters. We cannot legislate morality nor a particular version of faith.
I believe that my spiritual life and secular life are not separate but intertwined. We are not spiritual one day but secular another. Living each day is a combination of being spiritual and secular.
There are many other topics in regard to traditional Christianity I could cover, but you get the idea. When people hear the word Christian, all sorts or stereotypical ideas come to their thoughts. The main point to think about is based on a Bible verse, by their fruits you shall know them.
Rather than automatically think all Christians are the same, wait a while and watch how they act and treat others. It will be clear soon if they are loving, kind, inclusive and accepting; or if they are judgmental, condemning, exclusive and force their faith on others.
The bottom line is, we all have some type of faith. If my faith does not lead me to love, help, encourage and allow others the freedom to have their own views and faith, then I need to keep my opinion and faith to myself.
Rather than forcing my way of faith on others, my goal is to be Christ-like day by day by being loving, joyful, peaceful, patient, kind, good and faithful. Forcing your faith on others, judging and condemning those who have a different kind of faith or a different view and opinion is not loving and certainly not Christ-like.
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Michael Donahoe was added as a writer for Done with Religion as his views fit perfectly with those that are shared on this site. He and his wife have been outside the walls of religion for fifteen years. He enjoys writing about his experiences and thoughts, and he wants to encourage others who are going through the religious deconstruction process. He also writes on Substack at https://personalmeanderings.substack.com/
Friday, May 23, 2025
How Can We have Unity Among Christians?
by Michael Donahoe
When we read in the Bible that we are to put on love which is the perfect bond of unity, we wonder how we go about doing that.
With all the different doctrines, interpretations, denominations and versions of the Bible, how is it possible for us to get along and have unity among the brethren?
It is by love. To put on love is to put on God. God is love and love lives within us. Even in all the differences we can be united in the love of God. Our common focus is Jesus. We can be one in God and still have different views and opinions. Because of the love of God, we can respect one another even with our differing views and opinions, and we can accept each other as brothers and sisters in Christ.
Love will bind us together and allow us to live in peace with one another. Many times, love is pushed out of the way for our own selfish desires. That is when disrespect, arguing, judging and condemning takes over, and it is not a pretty sight for those who profess to follow God.
Unity comes only through the love of God. It is not through religion, doctrines, denominations or Bible versions, but through God alone. The love and power of God through the Holy Spirit looks beyond religion, doctrines, denominations, race, sexual orientation and nationality.
God is love and God lives within us. By allowing the love of God to flow out of us we can look beyond our differences and accept one another even when we disagree.
Only by loving God and loving one another through the power of the Spirit will others see a difference in those of us who are followers of Jesus.
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Michael Donahoe was added as a writer for Done with Religion as his views fit perfectly with those that are shared on this site. He and his wife, after spending about fifty-five years in the institutional church, have been outside the walls of religion for fifteen years. He enjoys writing about his experiences and thoughts, and he wants to encourage others who are going through the religious deconstruction process. He also writes on Substack at https://personalmeanderings.substack.com/
Wednesday, March 12, 2025
What Can Good Marriages Do Even Better?
By Mike Edwards
It isn’t easy having a good marriage. Marriages, unlike many relationships, are a 24/7 friendship. Live with a friend all the time and see if the relationship is as friendly. Relationships often start off well because reality hasn’t set in – sharing closets, bathrooms, in-laws, children. Differences become more and more obvious. I wrote here what good marriages tend to have in common. They treat one another like they do their best friend, they talk and solve their differences in an open, productive way, and encouragements are at a ratio of least 5:1 per criticisms. Learning to live happily incompatible is complicated but worth it, and it always takes two to tango.
What negative flaw do solid marriages often have in common?
Everyone can spot an unhappy marriage. Just listen. But good marriages often violate an aspect of the golden rule necessary for a good marriage – treating their partner like they want to be treated. Want to give advice to your partner? Then advise and talk to like you would like you want to be given advice or if partner had a different opinion on a matter. Avoid being perceived as “snippy.”
I am guilty what I am about to advise early on in marriage and may still be. I worry if my kids picked up on this flaw! I think I am doing much better in this past decade but you would have to ask my partner, kids, and their partners. I notice couples who aren’t necessarily on the brink of divorce do this in front of others. Imagine what they do when others aren’t looking. When giving advice or differ with what comes out of your partner’s mouth…..watch the words you use to respond.
When disagreeing with partner don’t start with:
You need to
YOU should
What!
C’mon name of partner!
No …..
Huh!
Ask you partner how you can respond differently when having different opinions
Positive reactions when having different opinions
What about
What if
Maybe
Perhaps
Possibly
Ask your partner how your responses can be less critical/snippy when alone or in public
React to you partner in every situation positively and less critically or challenging!
Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. He couldn’t find enough people to discuss God openly so he started blogging years ago. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com
Wednesday, December 18, 2024
How Do You Not Turn A Child Away From God?
By Mike Edwards
It can be disheartening when our child does not share the same beliefs or passion about God as they get older. I have good news if reading this and kids are young or grown. My kids are in their thirties. I have things I could have done better. I did apologize what I thought I could do differently. If a parent has any kind of relationship, kids will get over mistakes. If kids are younger, you can plan ahead. Decide if my plan below makes sense or develop your own.
Parents. communicate the real reason for a relationship with God
Many of us who grew up in church were taught the reason Jesus came to this earth was to save us from Hell so we could go to Heaven. Your kid isn’t going to Hell regardless of their beliefs. A literal Hell isn’t biblical. See here. Jesus spoke of loving God not to get into heaven but to receive help in loving others here on earth. See here. Personally, the biggest reason for being a God-follower is the forgiveness, inspiration, and encouragement I sense in striving to be a better human being. Influences in our life don’t have to be audible. My parents aren’t alive but I am still influenced. Pursuit of a godly life is never in vain! The best a parent can do as children age is less talking if not interested and walking the talk. If God exist, God can handle matters.
Parents, it’s their journey not yours
Many parents assume if their kid question, doubt, or even wants nothing to do with God that they are going to Hell. Not true! When children are young and a parent believes in God and walks the talk for the most part, kids are likely to go along for the ride. But as our children get older, their relationship with God is their own personal journey. They aren’t into God like you. Relax! Stop worrying! Your belief in a personal God suggests God will engage with them in their own journey.
The Bible doesn’t always determine what God is really like
The biggest mistake I made as a parent was believing my interpretation of the Bible was always right. My son came to me after his teachers suggested evolution was the creative process God used for the creation of humans. I was emphatic that evolution wasn’t true because of my biblical interpretation of the Bible. Turns out I could be wrong – https://biologos.org/ I could have advised what I believe, but he had to decide what he is going to believe. Besides, it can’t be proven all written down in our Bibles about God was inspired by God, that the writers always understood God perfectly.
What image of God you portray to your children is so important!
The Bible is subject to interpretation and scholars don’t agree on many moral issues addressed in the Bible. We can also determine what God is like according to one’s own moral intuitions. Your child’s view of what a moral God is like is valid. Our mental views of God shape our attitudes toward God. My view of God inspires me to pursue perfection in my relationships without being paralyzed by guilt when failing. I have the “want to” to be perfect. I believe that motivation comes from God! Surely a loving God only seeks to love you like you wish you were always able to love others. We all know how we wish our parents had loved us. This is the God you can believe. Don’t convey God is hard to please and pissed off about sin rather than what sin is doing to us.
Have a Plan!
Don’t assume that your child’s unbelief or lack of a relationship with God is one being rebellious. There are personal or intellectual reasonable objections to not believe. I was raised in a home that preached belief in God and attended church more than once a week. I didn’t have a great relationship with my parents who pushed that belief. I can’t tell you why I never turn away from God. It isn’t because I am so outstanding morally. Others turn away from God in my situation. A relationship with God is your child’s personal journey. Parents can share their personal beliefs and even encourage when younger, but eventually we must leave a child in the hands of God. Strive to have a open, loving relationship with your children.
How Do You Not Turn A Child Away From God?
Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. He couldn’t find enough people to discuss God openly so he started blogging years ago. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com
Wednesday, December 4, 2024
How Do You Know Who Is Telling The Truth?
By Mike Edwards
I admit that I can’t read hearts and minds to know if one is telling the truth or lying for power, financial gain, avoiding liability, or trying to save their job. I will try to not make this political but religion and politics have much in common. Politicians often discourage civil discussions concerning disagreements and may resort to calling one a conspiracist, just like religious leaders calling those they disagree with a heretic. Open dialogue leads us to getting closer to the truth in religion, political issues, or science. Those who suppress debate – what are they worried about?
Trust those who openly acknowledge when they were wrong
Religion and politics are somewhat different – biblical interpretation cannot be proven due to future observation but science allows objective future observations. Scholars of biblical interpretation disagree if God condemns gay relationships. Future observations will not prove one right or wrong. But in science we did learn conspiracists turned out to be proven right that Covid shots didn’t stop infection and transmission of the virus. It seems to me that science has a way of correcting opinions that biblical interpretation of ancient literature doesn’t. Trust religious leaders who admit they could be wrong, or politicians who acknowledge when proven to be wrong. Many remain silent and hope you don’t notice.
Trust those who admit immoral actions
Would you forgive a spouse, leader, or politician if they committed adultery? That is up to you. But watch their actions when clearly caught betraying! Do they admit failure and agree to be held accountable 24/7, or do they blame their partner/stress/etc. for their actions? I am not excusing moral failures but many fail. Betrayal is a choice. I trust more those who accept responsibility and blame themselves as opposed to others.
Trust those that invite investigation or debate
Dr. Fauci claimed rejecting him is rejecting science. But science is an ongoing discussion. Some drugs approved initially are taken off the market. Religious leaders who claim their views are God’s Word and don’t invite debate – are they afraid to defend their views in public so individuals can decide for themselves and possibly disagree. Theologians who hide behind “God said,” are claiming to be holier than those that disagree with them. Politicians who don’t invite debate – don’t trust them further than you can throw them.
Trust those who have more to loss
Admire theologians who disagree with their congregation or superiors because they differ in their views of God. They are taking a risk in losing their job! There is not much risk agreeing with the common narrative. Watch for politicians who oppose the popular narrative. They may be more principled. Doctors who risk being de-licensed because of their medical views as opposed to Doctors who stand to benefit from the common narrative. Notice those who stand to gain financially or because of job security.
Trust more those that admit uncertainty
Those who claim certainty often are naïve and may have other internal motives. Certainty is an illusion unless talking about universal moral sins such as rape or incest. Most decisions are not black and white and require open debate. Assume uncertainty if you have one rational friend who believes differently from you whether it’s about religion or politics. Couples who claim certainty are headed toward divorce or a sucky relationship. God-followers and religious leaders seem hell-bent in telling people what they must believe about God according to their understanding and interpretation of the Bible. Politicians who refuse debate of their policies are no different. Religious or political leaders play God (Superior) in the lives of others by claiming to know the truth and we can’t decide for ourselves.
Kids are lying when they don’t want to talk about what they did or believe
Trust your instincts whether one is telling you the truth. Trust those who admit wrong or invite investigation of their beliefs. Few such leaders seem to exist!
How Do You Know Who Is Telling The Truth?
Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. He couldn’t find enough people to discuss God openly so he started blogging years ago. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com
Thursday, November 7, 2024
Can We Be More Considerate Saying We Are Made In God’s Image?
By Mike Edwards
What prompted this Post is hearing Christian leaders often declaring all, even unbelievers, are made in God’s image. We can be more sensitive to those who question the Bible and more understanding there are differences what exactly is claimed about God’s image/character. Now, if someone declares we are made in Satan’s image, we have a verbal fight on our hands. Those who claim we are made in God’s image often do so because they believe we humans should strive to be perfect like God. But we don’t all agree what God’s perfection is according to the Bible.
The Bible is the main source for claiming we are made in God’s image
The Bible is often quoted to defend we are made in God’s image. “So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.” (Gen 1:27) The Bible also claims God commanded genocide – “This is why the Lord Almighty says Now go, attack the Amalekites and totally destroy all that belongs to them. Do not spare them: put to death men and women, children and infants, cattle and sheep, camels and donkeys.” (I Sam 15:2-3). See 9 Reasons To Not Trust The Bible’s Claims About God! The truth is we cannot prove God necessarily approve of everything written about God in the Bible. Personally, I don’t mind hearing I am made in God’s image, but we must be careful regarding assumptions about God’s character.
What is God’s image according to the Bible when it comes to moral perfection?
Many claim that God tortures those forever in the afterlife if reject God here on earth, that God rejects women in leadership roles, and God condemn others for being attracted to the same gender. Who can blame others for rejecting a God contrary to our moral intuitions! One’s view of God is often based on one’s interpretation of the Bible or belief that the biblical writers understood God perfectly. We can’t prove the biblical writers were always right about God, but even if the writers had perfect understanding the Bible is subject to interpretation. The truth is biblical scholars who have a deep respect for Scriptures don’t agree what the Bible says about gays, women, hell, and other moral issues. See here. See here. See here.
And what about evolution?
We don’t know how we all got here. Did God create out of nothing the first man and woman – Adam and Eve from where we all originate? We can’t prove the first couple in Genesis are historical or fictional people created for the purpose of talking about God and human relationships. The biblical writers of Genesis weren’t there in the beginning of creation. Many Christian scientists believe humans evolved over time beginning with the animal kingdom. See https://biologos.org/ If this turns out to be true, were the first creations (not humans) made in God’s image? I just think we need to be more thoughtful in our declaration being made in the image of God. Am I made in an animal’s image?
Whose image are we made in?
I might say “Since I believe in a perfect Creator, I am convinced a Creator loves the way their creations know how they ought to love one another.” The challenge though is that even Christians don’t agree what God’s perfect love is like. We don’t have to all agree whose image we are made in, but we can surely agree we should all strive to be perfect – loving others like we want to be loved. What image we should proclaim isn’t that complicated – what is perfect love!
Can We Stop Saying Everything Happens For A Reason!
Can We Stop Saying We Know What Biblical Truths Are?
Can We Stop Saying Our Rights As A Nation Come From God?
Can We Stop Saying “Biblical Worldview”?
Can We Stop Saying “Love The Sinner, Hate The Sin”!
Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. He couldn’t find enough people to discuss God openly so he started blogging years ago. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com
Thursday, September 12, 2024
Good News – God Can’t Be In Control!
by Mike Edwards
It is intuitive to assume an all-powerful, almighty God has complete control. We sometimes assume God has total control when we say “why God” during suffering. It is often said that God has a plan for your life or everything happens for a reason. This implies God is responsible for tragedies in your life. I doubt that! See here what God’s plan is for your life.
God can’t be controlling
Logically, God can’t be all-controlling or all-powerful and humans have some freedom/power? Besides, controlling love is an oxymoron. Ask adult children with such parents. Even the Bible claims love does not insist on its own way (I Cor 13:5). God can’t be unloving, thus controlling sometimes. In God’s defense, it is not possible for God to create freedom unless there is the possibility of love or hate. Without freedom we could accuse God of not creating the very best world where only true, authentic relationships can develop. We must rethink if God can have unlimited control or power.
God doesn’t plan tragedies in your life
No, God doesn’t plan for you to be unable to have children if you desire to be a mom or dad
No, God doesn’t plan for your body to be wrecked by cancer
No, God didn’t want you sexually or physically abused as a child
No, God didn’t want your partner to leave you by wanting a divorce
No, God didn’t want your loved one murdered or severely injured in a car accident
No, God didn’t want you let go from your job
Doesn’t the Bible claim God is all-powerful?
The Bible can be used to defend or oppose believing God is all-powerful or controlling. For instance, the Bible says God changes their mind based on human decisions made. That hardly appears to be a controlling attribute. So much evil in the world surely proves a perfect, loving God can’t be in total control. If a Creator exists, surely a Creator loves the ways their creations ought to love one another. I am convinced true Godly or human love can’t be controlling.
Does God just “allows” your suffering?
If we hold on to God simply limits their Power, this suggests God can do something but doesn’t. We must come up with a better explanation that God simply allows – thus controls – evils but doesn’t cause evils. A God who can prevent evil but doesn’t is counter-intuitive to love. No loving parent or God sits idly by when they could prevent tragedies such as rape or murder. No, all evil doesn’t eventually lead to good as if some grand plan by God! Ask sexual abuse victims or family members of murdered victims. Are we to believe God doesn’t care, God is punishing us, or God has abandoned us and left us clueless what the grand plan? God doesn’t just allow your suffering!
The possibility of a less powerful, uncontrolling God!
The only God worth believing in must be loving. God’s nature can’t be all-powerful or controlling. In our suffering we don’t have to feel God doesn’t care or that God could do something and doesn’t. Good news – God knows and empathizes with us in our suffering. God grieves with us. God can empower, inspire, and accompany us. God can influence us to follow Jesus’ example which can make for a much grander world. God doesn’t derive pleasure by seeing us in pain but the unfortunate truth in a free world is suffering happens. Lean on God and others for emotional support and encouragement in difficult times.
Good News – God Can’t Be In Control!
Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. He couldn’t find enough people to discuss God openly so he started blogging years ago. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com
Wednesday, September 4, 2024
Who Should We Vote For?
By Mike Edwards
I try to keep my Posts for the most part spiritual in nature as opposed to political. But those two arenas share commonalities. Both suppress freedom of speech or at least open dialogue. Try claiming God doesn’t condemn gays. You are called a heretic in many religious places. Dare to argue Covid vaccine benefits versus risks and you are called a misinformer or conspiracist. It seems to me freedom of speech is critical. May the pursuit of truth win!
Should we vote on a candidate based on sexual history?
Currently, there are two candidates running for President in November 2024. You may need to google several search engines about their possible past sexual behaviors. If guilty, they simply join a list of past Presidents. Isn’t it more important current behaviors than past transgressions they may regret? We don’t know if they regret their sexual past because no one ask, and our past sins aren’t necessarily best to be made public. Ask their partners. And since none of us were there in the bedroom in the past, we may never know the full truth. So, basing one’s vote on past sexual behaviors is tricky. We may find no one qualifies.
Should we vote based on one character’s – if a racist, Jew hater, etc.?
Both candidates are accused of being anti-democratic. Often, candidates are accused of being a racist. In past decades racists didn’t hide their hatred for those not their color. It was obvious. I admit I am tired of being accused a racist because I am a white dude. I married my daughter with my blessings and I have biracial grandchildren. Crazy but I love them as much as the white grandchildren. I never agreed with my parents that whites can’t share the same water fountains as blacks. Yes, I am old. I am not sure we can ever definitely determine one character behind closed doors or what is claimed by others. If candidates openly proclaimed they hate Jews (i.e. Nazis) – I don’t vote!
Vote on what you feel best for your country, children, and grandchildren
The joke is all politicians lie. Look for one who lies less. If you lean left make sure you read from those who lean to the right. I think it is fair to say the majority of mainstream media outlets lean left so the search is more challenging. If you lean right, make sure you understand policies and viewpoints of those on the left. I would suggest it’s not about one’s personality, unknown private affairs, but policies for our future.
Best decisions (finances, etc.) are made not just with our feelings but our cognitions too! Who has the best economic policies that help those who live paycheck to paycheck, not those who can survive inflation because fortunate to have extra monies? Who has the best border policies that protect us from letting in those who wish to harm us with drugs or who are on terrorist lists, etc.? Who has the best crime policies that protect us from evil people while pushing for equal justice for all? Who best advocates for free speech so the best ideas can win the truth debate? You decide!
Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. He couldn’t find enough people to discuss God openly so he started blogging years ago. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com
Wednesday, August 21, 2024
How Do You Decide What God Is Really Like?
By Mike Edwards
I try to answer this question often in my blogs over the years. After all, I named my personal blog some 15 years ago “What God May Really Be Like.” I use the word “may” because I got tired of preachers always being certain what God is like. I recognized such an attitude because I offended enough people early on being so damn certain! I ended up leaving the institutional church because religious folks often assume their interpretation of the Bible was correct and can’t discuss differences. My moral intuitions didn’t always agree with their interpretation.
It matters what you think God is like
Our understanding of God can determine the depth of our relationship with God and how we might treat others. If God really created Hell, we may think we should emulate God in our attempts to judge and punish. If God condemns gays, we will condemn gays out of devotion to God. If we believe God thinks men have authority over women at home or in church, that will filter down to our wives, daughters, and friends and stifle their gifts. See It Matters If Your God Is Nurturing Or Authoritative!
You can’t always depend on the Bible
Some interpret the Bible to claim God condemns gays. Others who have the same respect for Scriptures interpret the Bible not condemning monogamous gay relationships. See here. Sometimes, biblical writers seem to contradict one another. Hebrews 10:26 says: “If we deliberately keep on sinning after we have received the knowledge of the truth, no sacrifice for sins is left.” But I John 1:7 says “But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin.” So, did the Cross forgive us from our ongoing addictions, though we know we are hurting ourselves and others? Or are we screwed in God’s eyes if we continue willful behaviors after we see “the light?”
God must be perfect!
I imagine anyone who believes in a God/Creator thinks that such a Spirit must be perfectly moral. No other God is worth believing in. If you believe in a Creator, surely you assume such a perfect Creator would create us in their image? I think the best analogy to a perfect God is what a perfect Mother or Father is like. We all have a clue being a child of parents. Now, knowing perfection isn’t always black and white. Does justice for the victim’s family include capital punishment? Should I allow my child to hit bottom in their addiction or intervene. It may depend on their age I suppose. But should I allow my son to be abusive to his dates? Hell hath no fury!
Trust your moral intuitions unless . . .
If your biblical interpretation is contra to your moral intuitions, why would God create you to intuitively feel differently? You can also assume that maybe biblical writers didn’t always understand God perfectly at the time. Do you think your God believes that you have authority over the opposite gender that they don’t have over you (I am talking to you men), please reconsider! Give me an inch and I may take a mile. We don’t always know what a perfect God would do. But a place to begin in imagining what God is like is how you believe you ought to treat others – unless you are a terrorist that relies on your interpretation of a supposed inspired Book!
How Do You Decide What God Is Really Like?
Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. He couldn’t find enough people to discuss God openly so he started blogging years ago. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com
Friday, August 9, 2024
What May Be The Main Reason We Can’t Agree To Disagree?
By Mike Edwards
I written here many fears we may face in sharing certain beliefs with others. I am probably being too simplistic suggesting a main reason why we don’t discuss our differences whether it be about God or politics, but I am looking how to begin a discussion. I know many don’t venture certain discussions because of the consequences. Pastors loss their job if certain opinions about God are contrary to what their congregation believes. We have seen medical doctors’ licenses threaten with not agreeing with the Covid vaccine narrative. But I am desperate to understand why we avoid important conversations. Don’t we get closer to the truth sharing our opinions with one another?
We avoid pain by staying away from certain conversation
For one to question a main belief they have been taught in church all their life, such as if Hell is real, can create doubts about other beliefs they have been taught. Questioning if the Covid shots are safe in the long-run, if we have gotten the shots, can raise anxiety about our health. Perceived certainty rather than uncertainty is more comforting psychologically. Unknowing can create confusion or anxiety. Anxiety is avoided by not discussing one’s beliefs with others who believe differently. I imagine also many avoid certain discussions because they don’t feel able to defend their position or they prefer to avoid possible conflict generally.
I have written here how assuming certainty during uncertainty can be a relationship destroyer. Certainty is an illusion unless talking about universal moral sins such as rape or incest. Adultery isn’t only wrong in the eyes of the betrayer. Most decisions are not black and white and require open debate by those in authority. Assume uncertainty if you have one rational friend who believes differently from you whether it’s about religion or politics.
Civil discussions are critical in the pursuit of truth
Obviously, we may also avoid disagreements because such discussions can get heated. We must control our emotions when discussing our beliefs. We must talk to others like we want to be talked to. We must stop labelling others. We often are quick to consider or call others heretics or conspiracists when differing in religion or politics. How about thinking one has a different opinion than resorting to name calling!
How can we begin having civil discussions?
- We must stop thinking our views are morally superior to those we disagree with unless speaking of universal accepted moral truths
- We must handle differences with physical and emotional civility, accepting that misinformation isn’t opinions that don’t agree with our own
- We can begin conversations by looking for areas we agree
- We can defend our reasoning, respect the opinions of others, and commit to pursuit of truth
What about those who refuse to agree to disagree?
Do Christians or God-folks always look the other way or forgive uncivility – not treating others like they want to be treated? I don’t have to accept those who demand a literal Hell is biblical at the expense of unbelievers in their journey here on earth. See here. If one insists Hamas raping women and burning babies alive is justifiable because of perceived past disputes, I will condemn you. Jesus didn’t forgive the Pharisees before condemning their ridiculous religious laws. Open-mindedness doesn’t mean there aren’t common, universal, moral beliefs. Wisdom is required!
What May Be The Main Reason We Can’t Agree To Disagree?
Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. He couldn’t find enough people to discuss God openly so he started blogging years ago. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com
Wednesday, August 7, 2024
What Should Christians Be Known For?
by Jim Gordon
Christianity is the same no matter what country we live in, but for this article, we are talking mainly about here in the United States. In this country, we have a lot of people who claim to be Christians. What does that mean and how should we be able to recognize them?
As Christians, people should be known for their love. Their goal should be to follow the example of Jesus. Those of us who claim to be Christians go about showing our faith in different ways. Many feel that if we can preach in public, be a pastor, evangelist, or missionary, they will be known as good Christian people.
Others think if they give regularly to their church, or to programs to help the poor and other social justice issues, they will be known as good Christians. Many will base their identity on their works and all the good things they do to show they are good Christians.
Unfortunately, many will put their faith in political power, trying to force their beliefs on everyone. By doing so, they think they will make the country better by making laws based on biblical law and their interpretation of Christianity.
Basically, all these things are a waste of time. First, we are saved by grace, it is a gift from God and there is nothing we can do to earn it or pay for it. Second, the only way that Jesus says we are to be known as His disciples is by the love we have for one another.
Jesus told us to believe on the one who God sent and to love others as you love yourself. When we try mixing New Testament grace with the Old Covenant law, we are getting away from the truly good news and we are not loving one another as Jesus meant.
Some Christians think that by posting the ten commandments in schools, or requiring prayer in schools, or placing religious items in public buildings, it will show their Christian beliefs and force people to think about God. Now, I am not an advocate for putting religious postings in public buildings, but if there is going to be anything, the Sermon on the Mount would be much better. Rather than forcing biblical law on an entire country, promote the fruit of the Spirit, being love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.
Christianity should not be anything other than loving God and loving one another. We should be following the example of Jesus and never force our religious beliefs on anyone. God gave us freedom to choose, as Christians, we should do the same.

Jim Gordon and his wife left the institutional church after spending over fifty years within the system. Jim wanted a way to express his thoughts and concerns about the religious system and why he and his wife decided to leave the institution but not their faith in God. Jim can be contacted by email at: jimgordon731@gmail.com
Friday, July 26, 2024
Is Sodom and Gomorrah Really About God Condemning Gays? What Is The Real Story?
By Mike Edwards
This story in the Bible is often used to condemn gay relationships. I believe this passage along with other “clobber” passages (see here) are wrongly used to claim God condemns gay relationships. Whether one believe this story is historically accurate, the moral of this passage is used to defend that God destroyed this city because of one’s sexual orientation. Please see for insights below Josh Scott book Context Chapter 6
Lack of hospitality is the moral of the story
It may be foreign to our way of life, but cultural expectations during these times were to greet and care for strangers who may come to your city/door. See Josh Scott for more details. So, Lot extends his hospitality to strangers visiting in Genesis 19. Then, people of Sodom surround his home and insist his visitors be sent out for their own sexual pleasures.
It’s crazy to read though maybe not for a patriarchal society that Lot offered his daughter instead to be raped, but this story is more than about sex. It appears even after his horrific offer by Lot, the crowd outside felt judged by Lot not accepting their invitation to prey on strangers (19:9). I guess the only good news in this story is that these possible divine visitors (19:15) offered protection for Lot and family to leave before the city was destroyed by God.
Further evidence Sodom and Gomorrah about lack of hospitality or love in general
In other OT passages the writers emphasized the lack of hospitality, not being gay, as the moral concern regarding Sodom and Gomorrah. The prophet Isaiah in Chapter 1 condemns the Judah people by calling them “rulers of Sodom.” (1:10) They are then called out for their lack of justice for the oppressed not sexual sins (1:16-17). Isaiah didn’t understand Sodom and Gomorrah as a condemnation against homosexuality. Other passages agree the sin in Sodom and Gomorrah was about the lack of love toward the oppressed (Amos 4, Ezekiel 16). Even Jesus in the Gospel of Matthew, when referring to Sodom and Gomorrah, speaks of lack of hospitality as the sin. (10:9-15).
Besides, visitors came to rape not have a relationship
This story is about hostility and hate toward outsiders. Do we really think only gay men showed up to Lot’s doorstep to pry on male guests or did straight men suddenly become gay? And then Lot offers these supposed gay men his daughters for sex. Didn’t Lot know they were gay? This story obviously is not about consensual sex – straight or gay. This story is also not about a desire to be in a monogamous same-sex relationship.
God would surely condemn nonconsensual sexual relationships, but why would God condemn any relationships based on mutual love and respect. It doesn’t make moral sense why God would condemn gays when they can no more chose who they love than straights can. Ask your gay friends! Why would anyone choose to be gay based on the condemnation and bigotry they face? Please be careful picking a Bible story or passage to definitively speak for God.
Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. He couldn’t find enough people to discuss God openly so he started blogging years ago. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com
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