Why Doesn’t God Answer My Prayers?

by Mike Edwards

Quite obviously many of our prayers are not answered. We have every right to ask why God cured my friend’s cancer and not my own or one’s parent cancer and not my parent? Is God really that arbitrary in delving out mercy? What human or goldy parent if able to intervene in suffering does so for one child and the not the suffering of their other child. Where do we go to find answers?

Is the Bible our only source for answers about prayer?

Most God-folks quote the Bible when responding to questions about prayer. They often don’t admit their interpretation of a passage when addressing prayer may be wrong. It is not uncommon for biblical scholars, much less laypeople, to interpret the same passage’s meaning differently. Some interpret the Bible to condemn gays, other do not. Even if we all had the same interpretations, few admit that the biblical writers may not have always understood God perfectly. Okay, me neither! The Bible isn’t our only way to know God. I will suggest that God can’t always stop suffering. Why would a good God stand-by but not a flawed human parent watching their child suffer?

Two assumptions when trying to understand God and prayer

Many Bible-folks assume God is all-powerful, which demands an answer to why God displays Their power or not. Why God acts arbitrarily isn’t easy to answer if God is truly loving, unless you always blame unanswered prayer due to one’s sins. Often, it is proclaimed God’s ways are higher than ours and God is working it all for good. Tell that to a woman raped! It may also be suggested that we sinners have no right to question a Holy God, or that any good is more than we deserve since God’s standard is perfection and we all fall short as sinners. Some relationship!

A second less popular assumption is that God can’t be all-powerful. It is only intuitive that an all-powerful God can control suffering if able to create, be in all places at one time, resurrect Jesus from the dead, etc. But, logically how can God be all-powerful and humans have some freedom/power? Suffering (prayer unanswered) may be because God cannot intervene single-handedly. God can’t physically interfere in evil or suffering without human help. See here.

But miracles?

Lots of prayers asking for healing aren’t answered. Is God’s love infrequent or arbitrary? Do miracles not happen because some people are less sinful or beg better at the feet of an arbitrary God? I believe a better explanation for healings is that various biological and environmental factors are involved such as cells and organs.  If God doesn’t deny human freedom, it may not be a stretch to say God has to account for natural freedom as well. Perhaps miracles can happen when God’s love aligns with countless factors known and not known. God cannot intervene singlehandedly, but a loving God always wants to intervene whenever circumstances will allow.

Why then bother with prayer?

The Bible can’t be the definitive word on God since subject to interpretation and conjecture if God agrees with all written about God. Most Bible-quoting folks believe we are made in the image of God. God surely acts as image bearers think they should act when someone is suffering. I am convinced God is always seeking to intervene when possible.  We don’t have to assume God can answer our prayers but doesn’t for some unknown reason. God suffers with us, but the unfortunate truth in a free world is suffering happens, though God is dying to help. We can pray but be more understanding when God can’t answer our prayers. Lean on God and others for emotional support and encouragement in difficult times.

Why Doesn’t God Answer My Prayers?

Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. He couldn’t find enough people to discuss God openly so he started blogging years ago. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like  He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com

Why Doesn’t God Answer More Prayers?

By Mike Edwards

I was listening to a recent new popular song that seeks to assure “God answers prayer.” Let’s be honest. More prayers are unanswered than answered. Bold proclamations about God, without being nuanced or explained, can confuse or drive many away from God. Many are rightly disheartened about God when claims about prayers don’t match up with reality.

God can’t answer many prayers

God can’t wave a magic wand without accounting for freedom. It’s not that we didn’t pray enough with the right words and behaviors so God will answer. God can’t make one’s partner willing to stop drinking. A lot of prayers ask for healing. I doubt God is arbitrary when able to heal. Conditions in our body may not always be right. Various biological and environmental factors are involved such as cells, organs, etc. If God respects human freedom, it may not be a stretch to say God has to account for natural freedom as well. A caring God surely intervenes by all means when circumstances will allow just as a human parent.

Love can’t be controlling or arbitrary

Your view of God determines your perspective and how you pray. I experienced as a child and learned as a parent controlling love is an oxymoron. Love doesn’t insist on its own way (I Cor 13:5). It isn’t that God has the power to do something and doesn’t. God can’t change people or circumstances without them freely cooperating. Miracles don’t happen because some people are less sinful or beg better at the feet of an arbitrary God. Miracles happen when God’s uncontrolling love aligns with countless seen and unseen factors including human and organic agents.

Even the Bible doesn’t claim God answers all prayers

Jesus requested from God to avoid the Cross. History tells us God didn’t answer. There are of course many interpretations of passages used to defend one’s position.  Mt 7:7 says: “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.” But first-century readers didn’t assume this was a blank check for requests. The Apostle Paul expected persecution for beliefs (2 Tim. 3:12). I have a hunch Paul didn’t pray to be persecuted.

Isn’t a truly loving God doing all they can before asked?

Do we really think God is waiting to help others until we ask? Prayer must be more than manipulating God to act. God may wait for our invitation for personal help to be more the person we deep down desire to be, but God is tireless in doing all they can for others and desperately seeks our help to change the world. God can’t singlehandedly change a free world without our help. But the truth is it can rain on the righteous and the sun can shine on evil in an uncontrolled world (Mt 5:45).

So, why pray?

Prayer is more than asking for things. We can also talk to God for self-examination, for sharing our concerns so to not feel along in a chaotic world. Seeking God’s influence in our lives can lead to making wiser choices. God is tireless in working through individual lives to change the world. It isn’t that you didn’t beg enough or behave enough. God hears your prayers and walks alongside you in a world challenging to God and you. God hates when prayers can’t be answered. God feels the same pain you are experiencing. God shares the dreams you have for your future.  Conventional thinkers don’t like to suggest God has feelings of vulnerability, but they don’t mind talking about God’s wrath. We may wish God would just intervene but there may be legitimate reasons why God can’t. But God is with you each step of the way and surely encourages reaching out to others for help as well.

What God May Really Be Like!

Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like  He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com